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Poetry New Poems Tranquillity Street Page 3 - Page 1 Page 2 Bridge Over The Aire - Page 1 Page 2 |
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TRANQUILLITY STREET NEW AND SELECTED POEMS |
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OXFORD ANTHOLOGY OF TWENTIETH CENTURY POETRY’ POEM TO BE PLACED IN A BOTTLE AND CAST OUT TO SEA
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CONTENTS |
PLEA FOR A HISTORY OF WORKING-CLASS LEEDS
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‘OXFORD ANTHOLOGY OF TWENTIETH CENTURY POETRY’ To Simon Jenner
NO ARMITAGE (I’d like to see his rage) NO DUHIG (one dig long overdue) NO GREENLAW (M & S might sue) NO IMLAH (ditto the TLS) NO CRICHTON SMITH or JAMIE (Tuma’s not haggis-crazy) NO CONSTANTINE (who’ll miss his donnish whine?) NO LONGLEY (the QMP tick didn’t do the trick) NO PORTER (long overdue for slaughter) NO MAXWELL, MORRISON or MOTION (to miss that lot I’d swim an ocean) NO PATERSON, NO BURNSIDE, NO SWEENEY or O’BRIEN (triumphs of criticism by omission), BUT WHY DID PRYNNE REFUSE TO BE IN? -wilful obscurity, hidden grandiosity- -what is this Prynne idolatry? All those New Gen poets Thwacked by omission NOT EVEN PAULIN IS IN NO DUNMORE OR DURCAN O’DONOGHUE or BHATT -you can hardly do better than that! It really made my day Pity it was too late for you To review in ERATICA TWO
Note: QMP- Queen’s Medal for Poetry
Sorry, Writer in Residence on the Great North Run The last thing I’d ever do is listen to your spin “You risk losing potential allies in your war against the philistines, Astley, Armitage, Duffy, Sansom, unashamedly provincial, Defiantly Un-Oxbridge, not the enemy!”
Sorry, Andy, arse-licking's not to my taste. I always thought it wasn’t yours, my mistake!
SORRY I MISSED YOU(or ‘Huddersfield the Second Poetry Capital of England Re-visited’)
What was it Janice Simmons said to me as James lay dying in Ireland? “Phone Peter Pegnall in Leeds, an ex-pupil of Jimmy’s. He’s organising A benefit reading, he’d love to hear from you and have your help.”
‘Like hell he would’ I thought but I phoned him all the same At his converted farmhouse at Barswill, a Lecturer in Creative Writing At the uni. But what’s he written, I wondered, apart from his CV?
“Well I am organising a reading but only for the big people, you understand, Hardman, Harrison, Doughty, Duhig, Basher O’Brien, you know the kind, The ones that count, the ones I owe my job to.” We nattered on and on until by way of adieu I read the final couplet Of my Goodbye poem, the lines about ‘One Leeds Jimmy who could fix the world’s. Duhigs once and for all/Write them into the ground and still have a hundred Lyrics in his quiver.’
Pete Stifled a cough which dipped into a gurgle and sank into a mire Of strangulated affect which almost became a convulsion until finally He shrieked, “I have to go, the cat’s under the Christmas tree, ripping Open all the presents, the central heating boiler’s on the blink, The house is on fucking fire!”
So I was left with the offer of being raffle-ticket tout as a special favour, Some recompense for giving over two entire newsletters to Jimmy’s work: The words of the letter before his stroke still burned. “I don’t know why They omitted me, Armitage and Harrison were my best mates once. You and I Must meet.”
A whole year’s silence until the card with its cryptic message ‘Jimmy’s recovering slowly but better than expected’.
I never heard from Pegnall about the reading, the pamphlets he asked for Went unacknowledged. Whalebone, the fellow-tutor he commended, also stayed silent. Had the event been cancelled? Happening to be in Huddersfield on Good Friday I staggered up three flights of stone steps in the Byram Arcade to the Poetry Business Where, next to the ‘closed’ sign an out-of-date poster announced the reading in Leeds At a date long gone.
I peered through the slats at empty desks, at brimming racks of books, At overflowing bin-bags and the yellowing poster. Desperately I tried to remember What Janice had said. “We were sat up in bed, planning to take the children For a walk when Jimmy stopped looking at me, the pupils of his eyes rolled sideways, His head lolled and he keeled over.” The title of the reading was from Jimmy’s best collection ‘With Energy To Burn’ with energy to burn.
DIRECTIONS/MISDIRECTIONS
I sit inside the train of tears The station mellow in shade Unoriginal phrases air-brush the canvas.
Puzzling minds I wonder If all are like my own Closed to stillness.
From girders hang the acrobats of gone Pearl grey Whistlers. We sat on A train like this once, you and I, Face to face but travelling In opposite directions- Or was it you alone I watched depart, Stood on the platform edge, anxious and alert?
FOR JAMES SIMMONS
Sitting in outpatients With my own minor ills Dawn’s depression lifts To the lilt of amitryptilene, A double dose for a day’s journey To a distant ward.
The word was out that Simmons Had died eighteen months after An aneurism at sixty seven.
The meeting he proposed in his second letter Could never happen: a few days later A Christmas card in Gaelic - Nollaig Shona - Then silence, an unbearable chasm Of wondering if I’d inadvertently offended.
A year later a second card explained the silence: I joined the queue of mourners: It was August when I saw the Guardian obituary Behind glass in the Poetry Library.
How astonishing the colour photo, The mane of white hair, The proud mien, the wry smile, Perfect for a bust by Epstein Or Gaudier Brjeska a century earlier.
I stood by the shelves Leafing through your books With their worn covers, Remarking the paucity Of recent borrowings And the ommisions From the anthologies. “I’m a bit out of fashion But still bringing out books Armitage didn’t put me in at all The egregarious Silkin Tried to get off with my wife - May he rest in peace.
I can’t remember what angered me About Geoffrey Hill, quite funny In a nervous, melancholic way, A mask you wouldn’t get behind.
Harrison and I were close for years But it sort of faded when he wrote He wanted to hear no more Of my personal life. I went to his reading in Galway Where he walked in his cosy regalia Crossed the length of the bar To embrace me, manic about the necessity Of doing big shows in the Balkans. I taught him all he knows, says aging poet! And he’s forgotten the best bits, He knows my work, how quickly vanity will undo a man.
Tom Blackburn was Gregory Fellow In my day, a bit mad But a good and kind poet.”
I read your last book The Company of Children, You sent me to review - Your best by so far It seemed an angel Had stolen your pen - The solitary aging singer Whispering his last song. INCOMPATABILITIESFor Brenda Williams
La lune diminue; divin septembre. Divine September the moon wanes. Pierre Jean Jouve
Themes for poems and the detritus of dreams coalesce: This is one September I shall not forget.
The grammar-school caretaker always had the boards re-blacked And the floors waxed, but I never shone. The stripes of the red and black blazer Were prison-grey. You could never see things that way: Your home had broken windows to the street. You had the mortification of lice in your hair While I had the choice of Brylcreem or orange pomade.
Four children, an alcoholic father and An Irish immigrant mother. Failure’s metaphor. I did not make it like Alan Bennett, Who still sends funny postcards About our Leeds childhood. Of your’s, you could never speak And found my nostalgia Wholly inappropriate.
Forgetting your glasses for the eleven plus, No money for the uniform for the pass at thirteen. It wasn’t - as I imagined - shame that kept you from telling But fear of the consequences for your mother Had you sobbed the night’s terrors Of your father’s drunken homecomings, Your mother sat with the door open In all weathers while you, the oldest, Waited with her, perhaps Something might have been done.
He never missed a day’s work digging graves, Boasting he could do a six-footer Single-handed in two hours flat. That hackneyed phrase ‘He drank all his wages’ Doesn’t convey his nightly rages The flow of obscenities about menstruation While the three younger ones were in bed And you waited with your mother To walk the streets of Seacroft. “Your father murdered your mother” As Auntie Margaret said, Should a witness Need indicting.
Your mother’s growing cancer went diagnosed, but unremarked Until the final days She was too busy auxiliary nursing Or working in the Lakeside Café. It was her wages that put bread and jam And baked beans into your stomachs.
Her final hospitalisation Was the arena for your father’s last rage Her fare interfering with the night’s drinking;
He fought in the Burma Campaign but won no medals. Some kind of psychiatric discharge- ‘paranoia’ Lurked in his papers. The madness went undiagnosed Until his sixtieth birthday. You never let me meet him Even after our divorce.
In the end you took me on a visit with the children. A neat flat with photographs of grandchildren, Stacks of wood for the stove, washing hung precisely In the kitchen, a Sunday suit in the wardrobe. An unwrinkling of smiles, the hard handshake Of work-roughened hands.
One night he smashed up the tidy flat. The TV screen was powder The clock ticked on the neat lawn ‘Murder in Seacroft Hospital’ Emblazoned on the kitchen wall.
I went with you and your sister in her car to Roundhay Wing. Your sister had to leave for work or sleep You had to back to meet the children from school. For Ward 42 it wasn’t an especially difficult admission. My first lesson: I shut one set of firedoors while the charge nurse Bolted the other but after five minutes his revolt Was over and he signed the paper.
The nurse on nights had a sociology degree And an interest in borderline schizophrenia. After lightsout we chatted about Kohut and Kernberg And Melanie Klein. Your father was occasionally truculent, Barricading himself in on one home leave. Nothing out of the way For a case of that kind. The old ladies on the estate sighed, Single men were very scarce. Always a gentleman, tipping His cap to the ladies. There seems to be objections in the family to poetry Or at least to the kind that actually speaks And fails to lie down quietly on command. Yours seems to have set mine alight- I must get something right. TO DAISY ABEY
In sleep I dream the gratitude I know I cannot say Now you are in a latitude where palm trees hold the sway There are always things between us that keep getting in the way And stop me from expressing the things I mean to say In a night of wind and weathers love will not go away.
APOLOGIES FOR ABSENCE
Sorry, Neil Oram (with an orange in my pocket) I can’t make ,your loch-side commune by bonny Drummadrochit.
Sorry Brenda Williams, I can’t share your park bench protest near the Royal Free At sixty I need a fire and slippers, -4 outside just isn’t me.
Sorry, Chris Torrance, I can’t make your Welsh eyrie Just spelling Gymmercher Isaf Pontneathvaughan quite fazes me.
Sorry, Seamus Famous, your hide away in Dublin Bay No doubt is bloody grand but I can’t face the journey to a far off foreign land.
Sorry James Kirkup, your Andorran niche Is just too complicated for me to ever reach. Apologies especially to Emily Bronte’s ghost - You are the mostest hostess that I could ever boast Your heather moor and cobbled street’s allure Are something I’ve put off until the braw New Year.
NEW YEAR POEMFor Jeremy Reed
Rejection doesn’t lead me to dejection But to inspiration via irritation Or at least to a bit of naughty new year wit- Oh isn’t it a shame my poetry’s not tame Like Rupert’s or Jay’s - I never could Get into their STRIDE just to much pride To lick the arses of the poetry-of-earthers Or the sad lady who runs KATABASIS from the back Of a bike, gets shouted at by rude parkies And writing huffy poems to prove it...
Oh to be acceptable and IN THE POETRY REVIEW Like Lavinia or Jo With double spreads And a glossy colour photo Instead I’m stuck in a bus queue at Morden London’s meridian point of zero imagination Actually it’s a bit like ACUMEN with the Oxleys Boasting about their 150,000 annual submissions- If what they print’s the best God help the rest...) At least my Christmas post had - instead of a card From Jeremy Reed - his ELEGY FOR DAVID GASCOYNE - The best poem I’ve had by post in forty years And Jeremy’s best to date in my estimate - The English APOLLINAIRE - your ZONE, your SONG OF THE BADLY LOVED - sitting in a cafe in South End Green I send you this poem, Jeremy, sight unseen, A new year’s gift to you, pushing through To star galaxies still unmapped and to you, BW, Sonneteer of silence, huddled in the fourth month Of your outdoor vigil, measuring in blood, tears and rain Your syllable count in hour-glass of pain. POEM TO BE PLACED IN A BOTTLE AND CAST OUT TO SEAfor Ken Kesey and his merry pranksters in a bus called ‘Further...’
Dear _______ and here’s where the problem begins For who shall I address this letter to? Friends are few and very special, muses in the main I must confess, the first I lost just fifty years ago. Perhaps the best.
I searched for years and wrote en route ‘Bridge Over the Aire’ after that vision and that voice “I am here. I am waiting”. I followed every lead Margaret Gardiner last heard of in the Falmouth’s Of Leeds 9, early fifties. Barry Tebb your friend from then Would love to hear from you.”
The sole reply A mis-directed estimate for papering a bungalow In Penge. I nearly came unhinged as weeks Ran into months of silence. Was it. I wondered. A voice from the beyond?
The vision was given Complete with backcloth of resplendent stars The bridge’s grey transmuted to a sheen of pearl The chipped steps became transparent stairs to heaven Our worn clothes, like Cinders’ at the ball, cloaks and gowns Of infinite splendour but only for the night, remember! I passed the muse’s diadem to Sheila Pritchard, My genius-child-poet of whom Redgrove said “Of course, you are in love” and wrote for her ‘My Perfect Rose!’
Last year a poet saw it In the British Council Reading Room in distant Kazakstan And sent his poems to me on paper diaphanous As angels’ wings and delicate as ash And tinted with a splash of lemon And a dash of mignonette.
I last saw Sheila circa nineteen sixty seven Expelled from grammar school wearing a poncho Hand-made from an army blanket Working a stall in Kirkgate Market.
Brenda Williams, poète maudit if ever, By then installed as muse number three Grew sadly jealous for the only time In thirty-seven years: muse number two Passed into the blue
There is another muse, who makes me chronologically confused. Barbara, who overlaps both two and three And still is there, somewhere in Leeds. Who does remember me and who, almost alone. Inspired my six novellas: we write and Talk sometimes and in a crisis she is there for me,
Muse number four, though absent for a month in Indonesia. Remains. I doubt if there will be a fifth.
There is a poet, too, who is a friend and writes to me From Hampstead, from a café in South End Green. His cursive script on rose pink paper symptomatic Of his gift for eloquent prose and poetry sublime His elegy on David Gascoyne’s death quite takes my breath And the title of his novel ‘Lipstick Boys’ I'll envy always,
There are some few I talk and write to And occasionally meet. David Lambert, poet and teacher Of creative writing, doing it ‘my way’ in the nineties, UEA found his services superfluous to their needs.
― ― you may fuck like hell, But I abhor your jealous narcissistic smell And as for your much vaunted pc prose I’d rather stick my prick inside the thorniest rose.
Jeanne Conn of ‘Connections’ your letters are even longer than my own and Maggie Allen Sent me the only Valentine I’ve had in sixty years These two do know my longings and my fears,
Dear Simon Jenner, Eratica’s erratic editor, your speech So like the staccato of a bren, yet loaded With a lifetime’s hard-won ken of poetry’s obscurest corners. I salute David Wright, that ‘difficult deaf son’ Of the sixties, acknowledged my own youthful spasm of enthusiasm But Simon you must share the honour with Jimmy Keery, Of whom I will admit I’m somewhat leery, His critical acuity so absolute and steely.
I ask you all to stay with me Through time into infinity Not even death can undo The love I have for you.
A FINE MADNESS
Any poets about or bored muses fancying a day out? Rainy, windy, cold Leeds City Station Half-way through its slow chaotic transformation Contractors’ morning break, overalls, hard hats and harness Flood McDonalds where I sip my tea and try to translate Valéry.
London has everything except my bardic inspiration I’ve only to step off the coach in Leeds and it whistles Its bravuras down every wind, rattles the cobbles in Kirkgate Market Hovers in the drunken brogue of a Dubliner in the chippie As we share our love of Joyce the Aire becomes the Liffey.
All my three muses have abandoned me. Daisy in Asia, Brenda protesting outside the Royal Free, Barbara seeing clients at the C.A.B. Past Saltaire’s Mill, the world’s eighth wonder, The new electric train whisperglides on wet rails Past Shipley’s fairy glen and other tourist trails Past Kirkstall’s abandoned abbey and redundant forge To Grandma Wild’s in Keighley where I sit and gorge.
I’ve travelled on the Haworth bus so often The driver chats as if I were a local But when the rainbow’s lightning flash Illumines all the valleys there’s a hush And every pensioner's rheumy eye is rooted On the gleaming horizon as its mooted The Bronte’s spirits make the thunder crack Three cloaked figures converging round the Oakworth track.
Haworth in a storm is a storm indeed The lashing and the crashing makes the gravestones bleed The mashing and the bashing makes the light recede And on the moor top I lose my way and find it Half a dozen times slipping in the mud and heather Heather than can stand the thrust of any weather.
Just as suddenly as it had come the storm abated Extremes demand those verbs so antiquated Archaic and abhorred and second-rated Yet still they stand like moorland rocks in mist And wait as I do till the storm has passed Buy postcards at the parsonage museum shop Sit half an hour in the tea room drying off And pen a word or two to my three muses Who after all presented their excuses But nonetheless the three all have their uses.
AN EVENING WITH JOHN HEATH-STUBBS
Alone in Sutton with Fynbos my orange cat A long weekend of wind and rain drowning The tumultuous flurry of mid-February blossom A surfeit of letters to work through, a mountain Of files to sort, some irritation at the thought Of travelling to Kentish Town alone when My mind was flooded with the mellifluous voice Of Heath-Stubbs on tape reading ‘The Divided Ways’ In memory of Sidney Keyes.
“He has gone down into the dark cellar To talk with the bright faced Spirit with silver hair But I shall never know what word was spoken there.”
The best reader of the century, if not the best poet. Resonant, mesmeric, his verse the anti-type of mine, Classical, not personal, Apollonian not Dionysian And most unconfessional but nonetheless a poet Deserving honour in his eighty-fifth year.
Thirty people crowded into a room With stacked chairs like a Sunday School A table of pamphlets looked over but not bought A lacquered screen holding court, a century’s junk. An ivory dial telephone, a bowl of early daffodils To focus on.
I was the first to read, speaking of James Simmons’ death, My anguish at the year long silence from his last letter To the Christmas card in Gaelic Nollaig Shona - With the message “Jimmy’s doing better than expected.” The difficulty I had in finding his publisher’s address - Salmon Press, Cliffs of Moher, County Clare - Then a soft sad Irish woman’s voice explained “Jimmy’s had a massive stroke, phone Janice At The Poet’s House.”
I looked at the letter I would never end or send. “Your poems have a strength and honesty so rare. The ability to render character as deftly as a painter. Your being out-of-fashion shows just how bad things are Your poetry so easy to enjoy and difficult to forget. Like Yeats. ‘The Dawning of the Day’ so sad And eloquent and memorable: I read it aloud And felt the hairs on the back of my neck prickle An unflinching bitter rhetoric straight out Hence the neglect. Your poem about Harrison.
“He has to feel the Odeons sell Tickets to damned souls, that Dante’s Hell Is in that red-plush darkness.”
Echoed in Roy Fisher's letter, “Once Harrison and I Were best mates until fame went to his head.” James, your ‘Love Leads Me into Danger’ Set off my own despair but restored me Just as quickly with your sense of beauty’s muted dance. “passing Dalway’s Bawn where the chestnuts are, the first trees to go rusty, old admirals drowned in their own gold braid.”
The scattered alliterations mimic so exquisitely The random pattern of fallen conkers, The sense of innocence not wholly clear The guilt never entirely spent.
‘The Road to Clonbarra’, a poem for the homecoming After a wedding, the breathlessness of new beginning. Your own self questioning, “My fourth and last chance marriage,” Your passionate confessions of failure and plea for absolution “His thunder storms were in the late night bars. Home was too hard too dry and far the stars.”
You were so urgent to hear my thoughts on your book And once too often you were out of luck, Heath-Stubbs nodded his old sad head. “Simmons was my friend. I’d no idea he was dead.” Before I could finish the poem John Rety interrupted “Can you hurry? There’s others waiting for their turn!” I muttered to my self, but kept my temper, just...
Eventually Heath-Stubbs began - poet, teacher, wit, raconteur and man Of letters - littering his poems with references To three kinds of Arabic genie The class system of ancient Egypt The pub architecture of the Edwardian era. From the back row I strained to see his face. The craggy jaw, the mane of long white hair. The bowl of daffodils I’d focused on before.
He spoke but could not read and Like me had no single poem by heart. In his stead a man and woman read: I could forgive the man’s inability to pronounce ‘Dionysian’ But when he read ‘hover’ as ‘haver’ My temper began to frazzle The woman simpered and ruined every line As if by design, I took some amitryptilene And let my mind float free. ‘For Barry, instead of a Christmas card, this elegy I wrote last week. Fond wishes. Jeremy..’
“So often, David, I still meet Your benefactor from the time: her speedwell-blue eyes, blue like yours,
with recollection, while we talk through leaf-fall, with its mosaic mottling the toad-spotted wet street.”
I looked at Heath-Stubbs’ face, his sightless eyes, And in a second understood what Gascoyne meant “Now the light of a prism has flashed like a bird down the dark-blue, At the end of which mountains of shadow pile up beyond sight Oh radiant prism A wing has been torn and its feathers drift scattered by flight.”
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You were the one I wanted most to know So like yet unlike, like fire and snow, The casual voice, the sharp invective, The barbed wit, the lapsed Irish Protestant Who never gave a shit, crossed the palms Of the great and good with coins hot with contempt For the fakers and the tricksters whose poetry Deftly bent to fashion’s latest slant.
You wrote from the heart, feelings on your sleeve, But feelings are all a master poet needs: You broke all the taboos, whores and fags and booze, While I sighed over books and began to snooze Until your voice broke through the haze Of a quarter century’s sleep. “Wake up you git And bloody write!” I did and never stopped And like you told the truth about how bad poetry Rots the soul and slapped a New Gen face or two And kicked some arses in painful places, And so like you, got omitted from the posh anthologies Where Penguin and Picador fill the pages With the boring poetasters you went for in your rages, Ex-friends like Harrison who missed you out. You never could see the envy in their enmity. Longley was the worst, a hypocrite to boot, All you said about him never did come out; I’ve tried myself to nail others of that ilk Hither and thither they slide and slither And crawl out of the muck white as brides’ Fat with OBE’s, sinecures and sighs And Collected Poems no one buys.
Yet ‘Mainstrem’, your last but one collection, I had to wait months for, the last borrower Kept it for two years and likely I’ll do the same Your poetry’s like no other, no one could tame Your roaring fury or your searing pain.
You bared your soul in a most unfashionable way But everything in me says your verse will stay, Your love for your fourth and final wife, The last chance marriage that went right The children you loved so much but knew You wouldn’t live to see grown up, so caught Their growing pains and joys with a painter’s eye And lyric skill as fine as Wordsworth’s best
they drank her welcome to his heritage of grey, grey-green, wet earth and shapes of stone. Who weds a landscape will not die alone.
Those you castigated never forgave. Omitted you as casually as passing an unmarked grave, Armitage, I name you, a blackguard and a knave, Who knows no more of poetry than McGonagall the brave, Yet tops the list of Faber’s ‘Best Poets of Our Age’.
Longley gave you just ten lines in ‘Irish Poets Now’ Most missed you out entirely for the troubles you gave Accusing like Zola those poetic whores Who sold themselves to fashion when time after time Your passions brought you to your knees, lashing At those poetasters when their puffed-up slime Won the medals and the prizes time after time And got them all the limelight while your books Were quietly ignored, the better you wrote, The fewer got bought. Belatedly I found a poem of yours ‘Leeds 2’ In ‘Flashpoint’, a paint-stained worn out School anthology from 1962. Out of the blue I wrote to you but the letter came back ‘Gone away N.F.A.’ then I tried again and had a marvellous letter back Full of stories of the great and good and all their private sins, You knew where the bodies were buried. Who put the knife in, who slept with who For what reward. They never could shut you up Or put you in a pen or pay you off and then came Morley, Hulse and Kennedy’s ‘New Poetry’ Which did more damage to the course of poetry Than anything I’ve read - poets unembarrassed By the need to know more than what’s politically White as snow. Constantine and Jackie Kay And Hoffman with the right connections. Sweeney and O’Brien bleeding in all the politically Sensitive places, Peter Reading lifting Horror headlines from the Sun to make a splash. Sansom and Maxwell, Jamie and Greenlaw. Proving lack of talent is no barrier to fame If you lick the right arses and say how nice they taste. Crawling up the ladder, declaring shit is grace.
A talented drunken public servant Has the world’s ear and hates me. He ought to be in prison for misuse Of public funds and bigotry; But there’s some sparkle in his poetry.
You never flinched in the attack But gave the devils their due: The ‘Honest Ulsterman’ you founded Lost its honesty the day you withdrew But floundered on, publicly sighed and Ungraciously expired as soon as you died.
You went with fallen women, smoked and sang and boozed, Loved your many children, wrote poetry As good as Yeats but the ignominy you had to bear Bred an immortality impossible to share. You showed us your own peccadilloes, Your early lust for fame, but you learned The cost of suffering, love and talent winning through, Your best books your last, just two, like the letters You wrote before your life was through.
The meeting you wanted could never happen: I didn’t know about the stroke That stilled your tongue and pen But if you passed your mantle on to me I’ll try and take up where you left off, Give praise where praise is due And blast the living daylights from those writers who Betray the sacred art of making poetry true To suffering and love, to passion and remorse And try to steer a flimsy world upon a saner course.
MEMORIES OF THE FIFTIES
Eggshell and Wedgwood Blue were just two Of the range on the colour cards Dulux Tailored to our taste in the fifties, Brentford nylons, Formica table tops and Fablon shelf-covering in original oak or Spruce under neon tubes and Dayglo shades.
Wartime brown and green went out, along with The Yorkist Range, the wire-mesh food safe In the cellar, the scrubbed board bath lid And marbled glass bowl over the light bulb With its hidden hoard of dead flies and Rusting three-tier chain.
We moved to the new estate, Airey semis With their pebble-dash prefabricated slats, Built-in kitchen units and made-to-measure gardens. Every Saturday I went back to the streets, Dinner at Auntie Nellie’s, Yorkies, mash and gravy, Then the matinee at the Princess with Margaret, The queen of my ten-year old heart.
Everybody was on the move, half the neighbours To the new estates or death, newcomers with Rough tongues from over the bridge slum clearance. A drive-in Readymix cement works bruised the Hollows, Ellerby Lane School closed, St. Hilda’s bulldozed. The trams stopped for good after the Coronation Special In purple and gold toured the city's tracks and The red-white and blue on the cake at the street party Crumbled to dust and the river-bank rats fed on it Like Miss Haversham’s wedding feast all over again.
The cobbled hill past the Mansions led nowhere, The buses ran empty, then the route closed. I returned again and again in friends’ cars, Now alone, on foot, again and again.
RESURRECTION
I thought of my ‘faculty of poetry’ As of the eye The bream or white-bait showed In its hysterical dance of death When the receding tide Left it asleep In a shallow pool on the shore.
Why did I fail to take it? Was I strangely compassionate Or merely afraid to touch The jerking spasm of flesh With the still eye?
Or was it I on the shore In the shallow pool, left by the tide, Engaged in that mystic dance of death, Twenty years before?
THE PRISM
Through the windows the sun’s light Turns to amber, the moon’s to jade; All night long I lie awake, wondering How much your stunned heart can take. That moment’s ‘sudden interminable splendour’, Our love kept up through the years of stress, Strange dark-haired creature, the light over the water Burns and beckons through our emptiness.
THE COLOSSUS(Goya, an old man in exile, looks at his self-portrait)
A bull’s neck, still much needed, Deserving exile or the guillotine, ‘Because you are an artist we forgave you’, Thus his royal highness gave thanks, My fingers itching for brush and canvas, Floury cheeks and rouge, legs a donkey would be ashamed of, A wife who’s been to bed with everything in Madrid.
First I was ‘untalented’, then ‘mad and deaf’ Still I painted, my pain drew me on, My kingdom had majas nude or veiled Always with dark eyes like her Whom I loved and they poisoned, Duchess of Alba, dressed in silver grey, A white pekinese at her feet with the world: On the sand my name with hers And ‘always’.
Old men easily grow afraid; Spain and her blood are distant. Alba dead I paint my ‘Milkmaid of Bordeaux’ In lingering silver-grey.
GAUGUIN IN THE SOUTH SEAS
They have my own fear of the dark, Tupapau - spirits of the dead they call it; Returning late with oil I found fear of it Had spread my vabine naked on the bed.
Manao-Taipapau means ‘she thinks of the spectre’ Or ‘the spectre is thinking of her’, either way She is afraid; I marvel at a tongue so readily ambiguous, Lying across her forked thigh.
I buy rum for her ‘many parents’, for her One cheap dress a month suffices; in return She gathers fish and wild-fruit from the blue Mountain groves where no white man walks. Once when I fished from the long canoes A fish caught the hook in its lower jaw, laughing I learnt this meant my vahine was unfaithful : She answered ‘Beat me’ but I lay down by her side. I bathe in ‘the stream of life’, naked to offend The priestly beetles - Cezanne’s ‘red shout’ indeed. Waiting for mail I accumulate bills, pictures and sores Side by side, lying down alone in the dark.
THE CARDINAL LOOKS BACK
I was a good father to my people, Their houses among the terraced hills Adored God every day, grape-clusters on the vines Made Christ’s blood richer in the goblet My father gave me: the chased silver had vines Round the stem and Cellini made it, ‘Let him take it to Rome’, he had said, ‘The Pope will adore it.’ The backs of my people Bent as I held it aloft with the Host, The silver blazed in our eyes like the sun, Their lips were cracked as they sipped The delicate wine, the crook of my finger already Held the ring of a Bishop but I would not go; ‘When the harvest is over’, I said, let me bless The gathered grapes, I love to watch the purple juice Flowing from under their feet and the feast after. But my father called, I left my people With a sot who embarrassed the Bishop. I was not long in my see, two Popes died quickly And my father’s whispers never ceased, Rome called And I was Cardinal at last. It is hot, fever-ridden, No-one dare speak for the ears of spies; I toss at night in my high room through my window The villa’d hills, my private chapel has the goblet, I hear my people starved in a famine, Their harvest blighted for three years.
EVERYTHING IN ITS PLACE
Desks are straining on all fours, flanks Heaving to hurl the hunched riders Down crack and cranny, buck Finger-snapping lids, consume Scrap and scribble between tongue and teeth.
The blackboard is cleaning itself behind me, Making my neck prick as it scatters dust Like seed, empties its clogged pores of cliché, Anoints its carved channels and cavities With infinite black ooze and sap.
And I don’t trust that corner cupboard! Opening its dark doors like the jaws of Cerberus, shelving its stacks to heave At my head, ready to snap its quick lock Round my wrist like a crab.
I watch the windows wink and blink, Tug at their catches, tempt my fingers With their openings, crack flying cords To noose my neck; they eye the bulging roof Beams, bent like a bow above me.
This whole room has rushed to the world’s edge, My fingers tip its tottering walls Braced to hold definition, floorboards Knotted tight against infinity’s axe, doors Bolted to contain time and place in time and place together.
I cry ‘help’ as my world whirls, Is loosed at the single eye of heaven.
TOGETHERfor Brenda
Your blue dressing-gown Lying on the chair back Like a tired arm.
WAITING
I am waiting for the sky to flower Like poems in a winter mind: And yet they come, maybe trailing along An urchin gang, sobbing and snotty-nosed.
WAKING
Wires toss in the wind, shrubs flap And the tap on windows wakes us To March’s mistral madness: I see white crocuses amid the rain.
LETTER I
Go seek Prince Charming in another place, His is one face I shall not wear again You would not have the stars for diadem. The women are all wearing imitation silk scarves, Blackpool or Biarritz, sipping Woman, masticating The morning’s post, new babies and bathrooms, going To file, snip, fiddle and smile through fish-eyes, Crinkly green gloss, store it in stocking-tops For next year abroad, that Pill, so perfect!
Flashing smiles from shiny domes and polished eye-lenses, The men are glossy all over, snapping mortgages and scores They slap fellow-souls at a distance, gun down the abusive Clacking conductress, apologise over-loudly for their too Quiet cars. Plump fingers stroke smooth cheeks - bounce Bounce, bouncing baby- faces, so manly to wet-shave!
Head heavy from dreams of bronze-fleshed centaurs Tense with ‘The New Poets’ - no rhythm, failure of connection, Who slept with who to get in. Aargh! Forty rose-bearing ten-year old faces are waiting And behind them in the staff-room corpses are coffined In eternal celluloid faces.
CHANGE
As milled silver I was welcome In every gutter, tinkling over cobbles I rang the truth loudly on solid-oak counters And tills tolled for me clear as bells.
Boldly I gave myself to many, Slipped from moist palm to pocket, Pirouetting without points, jingling With dull coppers and important keys.
First I was lost in a hundred Children’s essays, found myself With pearls in secret pockets, Counterfeit and shiny. Then I discovered in a deed-box, Frowned over as I beamed a dusty smile Of centuries, polished till I pierced the fondness Nastily, with a sickly yellow glare. My smooth face made the end easy; I piled up with the rest, counted and Columned, exchanging memories In a sudden hot flood of death.
PORTRAITS FROM MEMORY
I Through my bedroom window The coal carts jolted over the cobbles A slow heavy rhythm full, Light and fast returning empty.
The coal office manager was a dwarf With sixty year old skin On a ten year old’s body and Hornrims on a wizened wizard’s face.
The enormous shire horses neighed In warning if you went near, Their polished brasses gleaming, Their worn blinkers waxed; When they brought in lorries A two year old died On the first day.
II Behind a creosoted fence lay The goodsyard with a single line Where LMS wagons shunted from Barnsley With wet coals gleaming All the way to Neville Hill.
I never connected the clanking wagons With our weekly coalmen, their faces Black like miners, their backs bent Under hundred weight sacks. They dumped each load to scree Down the cellar grate, Its jet-dust choking The sunlight.
III Behind the goodsyard lay the woodyard With slender knotted planks stacked round. One night it got alight, the heat Cracked my window but I never woke. When I read of the burning of Troy I remember Standish’s wood yard fire.
YOU“Remember, you loved me, when we were young, one day”
The words of the song in Tauber’s mellifluous tenor Haunt my nights and days, make me tremble when I hear Your voice on the phone, sadden me when I can’t make into your smile The pucker of your lips, the gleam in your eye.
The day we met is with me still, you asked directions And on the way we chatted. You told me how you’d left Lancashire for Leeds, went to the same TC as me, even liked poetry Both were looking for an ‘interesting evening class’ Instead we found each other. You took me back for tea to the flat in Headingley You shared with two other girls. The class in Moortown Was a disaster. Walking home in the rain I put my arm Around you and you did not resist, we shared your umbrella Then we kissed.
I liked the taste of your lips, the tingle of your fingertips, Your mild perfume. When a sudden gust blew your umbrella inside out We sheltered underneath a cobbled arch, a rainy arch, a rainbow arch.
“I’m sorry”, you said about nothing in particular, perhaps the class Gone wrong, the weather, I’ll never know but there were tears in your eyes But perhaps it was just the rain. We kissed again and I felt Your soft breasts and smelt the hair on your neck and I was lost to you And you to me perhaps, I’ll never know.
We went to plays, I read my poems aloud in quiet places, I met your mother and you met mine. We quarrelled over stupid things. When my best friend seduced you I blamed him and envied him And tried to console you when you cried a whole day through.
The next weekend I had the flu and insisted you came to look after me In my newly-rented bungalow. Out of the blue I said, “What you did for him You can do for me”. It was not the way our first and only love-making Should have been, you guilty and regretful, me resentful and not tender. When I woke I saw you in the half-light naked, curled and innocent I truly loved you If I’d proposed you might have agreed, I’ll never know. A month later you were pregnant and I was not the father. I wanted to help you with the baby, wanted you to stay with me So I could look after you and be there for the birth but your mind Was set elsewhere end I was too immature to understand or care.
When I saw you again you had Sarah and I had Brenda, my wife-to-be; Three decades of nightmare ahead with neither of our ‘adult children’ Quite right, both drink to excess and have been on wards. Nor has your life been a total success, full-time teaching till you retired Then Victim Support: where’s that sharp mind, that laughter and that passion?
And what have I to show? A few pamphlets, a small ‘Selected’, a single good review. Sat in South Kensington on the way to the Institut I wrote this, Too frightened even to phone you.
SUMMER FEVER
The unsettled trees seem to share My tensions of body and mind: Unable to move before the shell of the wind, Yielding as much as their nature allows, They will break if pushed too far, Splinter to show the white flesh of their wood And sweet transparencies of sap.
If 1 am pushed too far I will show The world our wounds, our nine months’ child In his robe of flesh and my wife’s tired eyes; We cannot sleep, alone or together, in case we conceive Another like this, tearing us from the shell of our senses, Bending our minds from their roots with his Eighteen hour shifts of need.
For nine months we have worked through days And nights; in the nine before his coming When once you fell I felt his body scramble In terror round the waters of your womb; Only the placental coil stopping the leak From life of his precious blood.
SMILE, YOU ARE ON CCTV
Even the charity shops boast of the surveillance Mr Average is caught on camera a hundred times a day To provide unending footage for reality TV But in a decade where will we all be? Big Brother’s eye will see our every step, The blink of every eye, the tears we cry. PLEA FOR A HISTORY OF WORKING-CLASS LEEDS
I want a true history of my city FUCK THE DE LACY FAMILY AND DOUBLE FUCK JOHN OF GAUNT ESPECIALLY And all his descendants With their particular vilenesses - I met one in the sixties Who had all the coldness of Himmler So svelte and adored by the cognoscenti.
I want a history responsive To the needs of the working-class One that will minute the back-to-backs Spread over the city like a seamless robe
SO FUCK CUTHBERT BRODERICK’S TOWN HALL BRIDEWELL AND MAGISTRACY.
I want a history of the culture Of the working class and not Hoggart’s slimy gone-up-in-the-world Jabber for the curious bourgeoisie He was especially maladroit On working-class sexuality A voyeur picking humorous moments To show the ignorance of the class He sprang from. “Anything was an occasion” - Or did he mean ‘excuse’? - “for intercourse, Even a visit to the chip-shop”.
O for the gentleness And the quiet intimacy And joyful spontaneity Of working-class sexuality
Reading Shelley’s ‘Defence of Poetry’ Sitting on a bus by a girl who, smiling, said, “I told Jack if he was finished with me He wasn’t having any but he pulled me Into the bushes laughing all the way So what could I say?”
I want a history of the warmth Of working-class mothers Explaining the mysteries of periods. To their adolescent daughters and the Revelations of working-class brides.
I want a history of family outings To Temple Newsam where I saw an ass Eating straw from the steel manger Of Christ. MY ONLY VALENTINE
Your voice on the telephone Hushes the storm in my heart Lightning strikes twice In the same place.
I cannot picture your face No photograph, no keepsake, No letters scented with your smile, No ring or marriage bed.
Your kisses were the best I ever had, my first, My only valentine.
THE OLD STRAIGHT TRACK
Runs to no compass point But starts within the human heart Where travellers in twos may go As for a while it winds beside A man-made road then veers aside
We met at a cross-roads once and journeyed Together for a while across a moor And then on horseback sadly you waved adieu.
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